Day 24: What is something I regret?
Hehe. I seriously didn't believe in having regrets until a couple of years ago, but to answer the question, I regret a certain friendship.
Without getting into too much detail, because it will instantly piss me off all over again, I had a friend that I considered a best friend. She had some secrets that she was keeping from her husband and she would confide in me about them. Because I have an insanely sick loyalty to people, when her husband confronted me about some of things that she was doing, I wouldn't say anything. At all. As much as it pained me to "lie" to him, at the end of the day, my loyalty was to his wife. Plus, I felt like that was their marriage and I had no business involved in it.
Even in the end, when I found out how she talked about me behind my back, I still didn't say anything to her husband. Trust me, I truly wanted to. Especially, when I found out that he had lost all respect for me because he felt like I was lying (which is no surprise because I completely suck at lying, so I try not to). So much so that he "banned" me from coming back to his house. It hurt, believe me, it did. Rightfully so, because I adored their kids and at times, I found myself missing the friendship. Hell, honestly, he was more of a friend to me than she ever was.
I guess it makes sense though, that I would be the one put at a distance. I mean, that's what people always do when they're in a miserable situation and refuse to leave the person that is making them miserable; they cut off ties to those on the outside. Find a way to blame others so that they don't have to lay blame where it rightfully belongs.
I used to be mad about that stuff, but I'm not anymore. I'm learning that misery loves company and if I am the one getting cut off then I need to take that as a blessing because at least I'm not the one having to be stuck in the miserable situation.
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