Because no matter how much you want to row, you can't...
I have been working like a little worker bee on everything in my life that I want to see flourish, including myself, and yet, I still feel as if something is missing. Some piece to the enormous puzzle that lies at my feet is missing.
Have you ever tried to finish a project when you don't feel complete within? Like, there's this huge hole that appears within every once in awhile and I try to constantly fill it in order to be whole again. The only thing is that it's like a starving monster with an endless pit for a stomach, so feeding it never really does anything for its hunger.
Hmmm... It could be that monster represents how I feel about my success. No matter what I do, it will never be enough.
I know I am being too hard on myself. I am always too hard on myself. No matter how accomplished I become, I still feel as though I am not accomplished at all. As if all of my hard work has been for nothing. I don't get it and I probably never will. But then again, we are our own worst critic...